The Almighty Tallest
by My Vantilene
Summary: When Xemnas leaves to take care of some "family buisness" for a week, he leaves the tallest person to lead after finding out what Invader Zim is. But who exactly is the tallest? It's not Roxas, that's for sure.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own KH, Code Geass, Doctor Who, an Entie, Heroes, Malcolm in the Middle, Treasure Planet, Fairy Tail, Host Club, Crystal Chronicles, Final Fantasy I – XIII, Front Mission, Invader Zim, Relient K, Switchfoot, Superchic[K], Star Wars, The Heart of Darkness, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, Narnia, Jarros, ABC Family, Young Justice, Phillip K. Dick, Rob Paulsen, Milo Ventimiglia, Thunder Cats, or Phineas and Ferb. Whew, glad I got that off my chest. Hopefully you won't hear from me again.

Chapter I: The Beginning of DOOM

Quick AN: Ha, you're hearing from me again, but this is important. I guess. Anyways, I can't afford any fancy pronunciation marks, so Namine will be spelled as so, the same goes for Saix. I'm sure there's some clever trick to getting on of those, but since I don't know what it is we will have to make do. And here's something interesting, when Axel, Xion, and Roxas are all at the top of the tower, replace dark and/or darkness with the word ice cream and see what happens. And yes, I did steal that from pwillard. Well, on with the story…

Saix was almost asleep when Xemnas sent for him. Upon seeing the tender pink insignia that formed an 'X' flash outside his bedroom window, he immediately ceased his futile efforts to fall asleep and rushed to the Superior's door, marked with an I. After a knock he heard a familiar, exasperated voice tell him it was alright to enter.

"I see you got the X-face call." he remarked when the Nobody walked inside. His room was mostly like the others, except for the walk-in kitchen and plasma screen, which he claimed were necessary for a cult leader to possess.

"It's not funny." he scowled as he crossed his arms.

"It wasn't my idea. Xigbar was bored and that's what happened," he rolled his eyes, "As we all know the things he does when he's bored aren't exactly for our merit."

"What did you want me for?" Saix inquired crossly, almost missing the view of the wall in his bedroom.

"This." he pointed to the TV, "I was in the middle of watching Eclipse when this – this disturbance erupted in its place. I don't even know what it is." he stared angrily at the screen that was illuminated with figures of children whose heads were too large in proportion to the rest of their body.

"It's Invader Zim." he answered, slightly annoyed.

"What?"

"It's a show Axel has been watching too much. Ya know, there's a rumor going around the castle that one of the extras, that's in every crowd, is a Larxel. A mythical creature with the hair style of Larxene and the hair color of Axel. Also, in one episode Gaz is wearing a black cloak similar to ours, near a building that looks like our tower that sits in the center of the World that Never Was." He plopped down on the couch in front of the TV and stared at a kid with a shock of black hair coming off the top of his head like a lighting bolt who was talking to a black man with white-fogged glasses.

"And why am I getting this instead of my program?"

"Because we have Comcast. I don't think it's possible to watch a show and record a show at the same time."

"So, Axel's recording this – this monstrosity?"

"Every night at twelve." He added, putting his hand in the bowl of popcorn that rested on the end table.

"Is it… any good?"

"I don't know, but don't you have to leave tonight?" he interrogated with a mouth-full of popcorn.

"At 6:00, but as you can probably guess, I have some free-time."

"You tried sleeping with all that spare time?" he asked with bitter sarcasm.

"Yes. It didn't work out too well."

"Figures." he scoffed, popping a few more pieces into his mouth.

"Might as well watch." he muttered underneath his breath as he sat down next to Saix.

"Wow, you've gotten taller. We were going to give you Vort, home of the slaughtering rat people, but instead you will be given Vlorg, home of the universe's most comfortable couch." Kevin McDonald's voice bleated through the speakers as Tallest Purple spoke.

"Invader Scooge, you seem shorter than I remembered. You're target will be Vort, home of the slaughtering rat people." A weird music played as tears filled the invader's eyes for a brief moment.

"I don't understand, why would they do that?"

"They operate that way. Irkens, I believe their race is called. Whoever is the tallest is the leader, and whoever can be taller than someone gets more benefits than them." Saix explained, chewing over some kernels from the bottom of the bowl.

"My, that's an interesting concept. A civilization like that must be amusing to observe."

"I think that was what the writers were going for."

"Hmm, as you know I'm leaving for a week and I probably will need to leave someone in charge to act as a voice of reason among these raging lunatics," he eyed Saix for the _luna_tics part, "I might just do this."

"Do what?"

"Just let whoever the tallest is lead."

"Why?"

"Because when I come back it will be an interesting sight – that or Lexaeus will do a great job." Just then, Xemnas's phone went off in his pocket.

"Hello." he answered. There was some incoherent mumbling rattling from the other line.

"He did what?" more inarticulate words were bounced and he responded,

"Fine. I'll be there as soon as I can." He hung up and got out of the chair, gathering his things. Which were literally Nothing. He owns Nothing.

"Wait, you never said where."

"Princess L wants me to handle our son."

"You have a son?" he questioned as if asking a toddler if the sun was really yellow.

"Yeah," he smiled mildly, "Trapping Ansem in the Realm of Darkness and taking his name was the best thing I ever did. I didn't just get his name and his housing contract, I got his wife and the rest of the nine yards."

"So, she really wants you now? What about six?"

"Well," he began, opening the door a jar once all of his Nothing was gathered in his satchel, "if I didn't leave now, Xirg would have to write our dialect for the next six hours, and she's anorexic today so her stomach couldn't handle writing us for much longer." he eyed him up and down and added with disdain, "You disgust her."

"Hey, you can't break the 4th law! You told me never to do that!"

"Yes, because it's only tasteful when Phineas and Ferb do it, they, after all, are the reason we even have Disney Channel on that infernal contraption." he gestured to the screen.

"True." Saix agreed, letting his feet take the place where Xemnas once sat, "But don't run Luke too hard, he's a good kid."

"But I'm his father." he looked at him sternly, "It's my job."

"Well, does he even know you're his father? Has he even seen you without that black, breathing hazard?"

"I'll tell him soon enough."

"Just do it soon before they get to him and–"

"That's enough." he stopped cold and closed the door behind him. He then proceeded to open the door again and scream in a high-pitched, girl's voice, "And stop reading my diary!"

After the door slammed, Saix muttered, slightly annoyed,

"Then stop leaving it in my room."

A~*~X~*~E~*~L~*~I~*~S~*~A~*~W~*~E~*~S~*~O~*~M~*~E

When Xion awoke that morning, she was sincerely surprised to find Roxas on her bedroom floor. Awake.

"What are you doing here?" she screeched, thinking the worse thoughts about her friend for a moment.

"I got kicked out of my room."

"Why?"

"Ugh," he groaned, rolling his ceruleans, "Apparently there's a new order to the castle with Xemnas gone, and Larxene said she wanted my room."

"What do you mean?"

"It's like the Irken system."

"Ahh," the interjection let Roxas know she understood, "That sucks."

"Yeah. I've noticed."

"We're the shortest, so…"

"So say hello to everyone's missions," he moaned, "We better get down to breakfast before it's all gone."

"What time is it?"

"Like, nine, I think."

"'Kay." She got out of bed and followed Roxas down the corridors to the dining hall.

"Oh, boy." Roxas uttered when he saw (for once) more than Vexen, Saix, Zexion, and Lexaeus up at "Like, nine."

He grabbed a Monster and waited in line for a blueberry muffin, while Xion waited with him, they talked.

"I don't get this," he began, "If Sora was four feet when he went to sleep and five foot six when he woke up, with a completely different face, and we're, what? – half way into Days right now? – how tall should I be? Or did I come into existence as mature Sora?"

"I'm not sure. I don't think Nomura likes the stages of puberty; he erased Sora's mems so he didn't have to go through that, and the fangirls could have a teenager to obsess over instead of nine-year-old."

"But, you do know he was fourteen in I."

"Well, he looked like a nine-year-old and–" Xigbar, who was in line in front of them, turned around and cut her off,

"Dude, what did Xemnas say in that faculty meeting last week? Don't break the 4th law. Xemnas already did it this morning, and you know what they say, fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice, shame on you."

"What? That doesn't make any sense." Roxas shot him a confused glare.

"He's right, Roxas. It ruins the magic."

"What magic? I'm getting a blueberry muffin."

"Okay, it's one thing to admit this is a video game. It's another to confess this is fanfiction."

"Oh, does that ruin the David Blaine factor even more?" he sarcastically asked.

"Chris Angel." she corrected him, "David Blaine sucks."

"Do you have any idea what Axel does to people who break that law?" Xigbar cut in, "He killed Zexion for almost mentioning that he had to die because his name didn't go with the ratings."

"What are you talking about? Zexion's over there." Xion pointed to the Cloaked Schemer who was reading Seal Breeding for Dummies as he picked up a plate and waited in another line.

"Yeah, now that you mention it, wasn't it odd that Larxene wanted my room? She's dead."

"Hmm…" Xigbar rubbed his chin, "We could be in inception…but, wait, wouldn't we wake up once we found out? Or maybe someone gave us that potent sedative?"

"Xigbar, do you happen to find yourself bored at the moment?" Xion asked politely in a peculiar manner.

"Yeah, why you ask?"

"That's why they're here."

"Ahh, now that makes sense. I was getting a little worried this _was_ fanfiction. I hate when that happens because I wake up with the taste of yaoi in my mouth."

"Hah, that's the beauty of being a girl. KH fans aren't big on yuri, so I'm safe."

"But sometimes people pair you up with Riku. And that's SoRiku in disguise."

"Oh, shut up." She elbowed him as he proceeded to pick up the muffin, but, to his great disappointment, Xigbar snatched it from him.

"What the heck, man?"

"Dude, you come up to my waist. I think I can have your muffin."

"Hey, I'm only 15, cut me some slack! Besides, you're like 40."

"Actually, I'm 28. I choose when I grey."

"Why'd you choose to grey?"

"So Demyx can tell me and Xaldin apart."

"Are you kidding me?" Xion laughed, "He's got to be more intelligent than that."

"Sometimes he gets you two mixed up."

"Really?"

"Yeah, but he's taller so I wouldn't malign him if were you." And with that he stalked off, Roxas's blueberry muffin in hand.

"Great." Roxas scoffed.

"Well, at least you have the Monster…?" Xion offered.

"Yeah, I guess you're right." He looked over at the tables and saw that every person was at their own table, a name written on it, some people had two tables with their name on it. Roxas sat down at the nearest table, but Marluxia told him to move.

"No." he replied.

"You will move. Or I will go to the nearest animal shelter and adopt a kitten. I will give you the kitten as a present and you will fall in love with it. That kitten will be your life. It will be all you ever think about or dream about, all your hopes and desires. Then, in the cold, heart of night I will break into your room, punch you in the face, and take the kitten back."

Roxas got up.

He had to drink the Monster sitting on the floor next to Xion and Zexion who, being the shortest member of the organization after Roxas and Xion, was kicked out of all the tables as well. He had traded in his Seal Breeding for Dummies book for a Punnet square that had some scrap math scribbled on the side as he continued to write down notes.

"What are you doing?" Xion inquired.

"Trying to figure out the genetic code to Billy Ray Cyrus's son."

"What are those symbols on the side?" Roxas interrogated, pointing to where he had worked out 1385720 x 75028492.

"It's a multiplication problem."

"Mul-tip-lic-a-tion…?" he questioned, the foreign word leaving a funny taste in his mouth.

"Yeah…Wait, do you know what addition is?"

"Add-it-ion…?" it was Xion's turn to test out the new word.

"Yeah, like 4 + 5 and stuff."

"What?"

"Oh, that's right. The two of you never went to school. So, you couldn't tell me what 2 + 2 was, parse?"

"Um…3?" Roxas guessed.

"Is it 5?"

"It's 4."

"I don't understand."

He turned the sheet of paper over and drew two circles, "If I have two circles and I add two more circles," he drew another pair of circles, "Then I have four circles."

"Ohhh…"

"So, if I have four circles and I add four circles, how many circles would I have?"

"Uh…Can I use the paper?" Roxas asked, his cheeks grazing a temporary sunburn from embarrassment.

"Sure." He handed him the piece of parchment and the pencil. He drew four circles, then four more circles in a separate group. He began to count aloud.

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. Eight."

"Very good. Now can you tell me what 8 + 8 equals?" He traced the circular figure with his pencil eight times in one half and eight in the other.

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen. Sixteen."

"Excellent. What about you, Xion, can you tell me what sixteen plus sixteen is?" Roxas handed her the paper and pencil and she began to write.

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two, twenty-three, twenty-four, twenty-five, twenty-six, twenty-seven, forty-two, twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty, thirty-one, thirty-two. Thirty-two."

"Good job. Now, without using the paper could you tell me what 3 + 3 is?"

"It's five!" Roxas answered jubilantly.

"Six." Xion replied nonchalantly.

"Xion's correct."

"Aww…"

"You were close, though." Zexion added.

"Hey, what's everybody doing on the floor?" Axel, with his flamboyant vocal cords, inquired, coming up to their corner.

"Marluxia kicked me and Xion out of our chairs and Zexion got kicked out by Luxord."

"On what grounds?" he asked, sliding in next to Xion and Roxas.

"Xemnas left some "all mighty" decree that the tallest person gets to be in charge, causing a stereotype against us. Therefore, I am blueberry muffin-less."

"What's that?" he pointed to the sheet with the math on it.

"I'm teaching them math." Zexion clarified.

"With circles?"

"Why don't they tell you why they need it?" he suggested with a laugh as he got up to head to the grey area.

"I learned 2 + 2!" he explained proudly.

Now this is where things went wrong. Axel, who had managed to steal Roxas's Monster while he wasn't looking, was taking a sip when he boasted about knowing the answer to the simplest addition problem in the book, so as he laughed, the drink snorted out all over the floor, just as Xaldin walked by and slipped on the liquid. Axel quickly put the Monster back in Roxas's hand and before anyone could blink he was gone. Xaldin, infuriated from the fall, went after him.

A~*~X~*~E~*~L~*~I~*~S~*~A~*~W~*~E~*~S~*~O~*~M~*~E

Roxas and Xion were on top of the Twilight Town clock tower, eating their sea salt ice cream, when Axel arrived.

"What the heck was that, man? Look at this," he raised the sleeve of his cloak to display the lance bites that decorated his whole body, "You're lucky he didn't make a Xigbar out of me."

"Sorry about that, I knew Xaldin was temperamental, but I didn't know how temperamental. Looks like he went insane. Curaga," he casted as a flood of green light pooled around him. Soon most of the cuts and gashes were gone, "So how did missions go today? Or did you learn what 2 + 3 was?"

"In fact I did. But as for the missions; horrible. I got paired up with Demyx. First, there was some girl with a blue t-shirt who kept pronouncing Demyx's name with a Z instead of a D. (I don't think that was horrible, just unusual.) Then, he left me alone with that freaky, Tim Burton-Heartless-coffin-tentaclaw-spore thing while he went and tried to flirt with that rag doll ginger."

"I got paired up with Vexen. He said some weird things…"

"What kind of weird things?"

"Plot revealing things, like–"

"Ah!" he screeched, covering his ears, "SPOILER!"

"Fine. I won't say anything."

"Good. I was getting edgy there for a second."

"Oh, and Vexen said–"

"SPOILER!"

"Vexen said–"

"SPOILER!"

"Said–"

"SPOILER!" she slapped him, then continued,

"He said that after he's done in his lab we have to clean it up."

"Really? Are you kidding me?"

"No. And quite frankly, I'm terrified of the place. It's dark and stuff."

"You scared of the dark?" Axel asked with a smirk.

"It's not the dark, it's what's lurking inside it."

"Déjà vu."

"Anyways…there's also an official pedobear sticker on all of his test tubes. And he plays Girl Next Door on full blast. I don't know how he concentrates with that racket."

"You spelled racket wrong." Axel put in.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm just say racket's spelled racquet."

"I don't follow."

"Oh, and bright and early we have to fold the laundry of the entire castle. Demyx's orders." Axel scribbled Demyx's name underneath Xaldin's and Vexen's.

"Why do you have to listen to him? What would he do if didn't do it?"

"What he'd do? What he'd do?" Roxas began, not unlike a certain Spartan general, "Not what he'd do, what THAT would do! You can say goodbye to the plot, it moves no where. There some things you just don't understand." Roxas shook his head.

"What I don't understand? What's 4 + 10?"

"Hey! Zexion said that was advanced math, no fair!" Axel rolled his eyes.

"Besides," added Xion, "You don't even no why the sunsets red. Red does not travel that farthest! Xirg got that wrong on a science review because of you."

"Well at least I don't sparkle!"

"What?"

"I'm sorry, that spoiler went too far. I'm not even sure if it was sparkles or ice. Could have been Darkness – no, wait, never mind that's what I do. Wait – what were we talking about again?"

"How Marluxia kidnapped James and he is now in our basement."

"Oh, yeah. Someone should definitely do something about that."

"Nah."

"Okay."

"Have you ever wondered how anybody in Twilight Town gets any sleep if it's always sunset?"

"Yeah, that's weird. And I feel like in the future I'm going to wake up in one of those apartments and pretend that it once nighttime and that I've lived there my whole life with no parents in sight, and no explicable reason why I'm there besides the fact a group of my three friends live in a whole in the wall with a dart board without any darts, where I should've noticed that I didn't belong there because Nomura only makes friends in threesomes, two guys, one of them older than the main protagonist, almost always being a shade of grey or the antagonist, with another girl being the love interest to the main character, while the older one either has to be single, written into yaoi, or date someone who doesn't exist. And maybe when a mysterious guy in a black cloak pick-pockets me, then maybe I'll realize because that has never happened to anyone ever."

"Roxas," Axel gasped with surprise, "That's ridiculous."

A~*~X~*~E~*~L~*~I~*~S~*~A~*~W~*~E~*~S~*~O~*~M~*~E

Roxas lightly wrapped on Xion's door. Not because he was trying to be polite, but because the door was locked. Otherwise he'd be inside shaking her awake. There was a moan and Xion yelled,

"I'm sick."

"No you're not."

"Yeah, yeah, I am, it's called – ugh, Silveritis." She claimed, seeing the closet thing to her at the moment. Read on, it makes sense.

"The inflammation of Silver?"

"Ugh – yes?"

"Xion, you better open this door before I knock it down."

"Why do you want to come in so badly? It's not like I'm hosting the Grammy Award after party in here."

The door came down pretty quickly. But not quickly enough.

"Run!" Xion shouted out her window. Once she heard the thud of the ivory door crashing to the ground, she shut the window and pulled the sallow curtain over it.

"What the–"

"Ow! I landed on a steeple!"

"Who was that?"

"No one. It was noth–"

"Oh, Jiminy Cricket, what – oh, ugh, my back, oh gosh, Bob Sagot! Ugh, ahh, oh, no, gosh, ahh, Free Willy! Oh, Kingdom Hearts have mercy, oh, ugggggggggggggggh!" Roxas and Xion just stared at each other blankly as the moaning continued, "Oh my word, ughhhhhh, ahhhhhhh, ugggghhhhhhhhhh, ahhhhhhhhhhh, goodness, gracious, great balls of fire, , AHHHHHHHHH, ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, in the name of Bumi – owwww! Oh, gosh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, is that _my _spinal fluid? Ohhhh, ahhhhhhhh, okay, I'm going now…"

"Seriously?" Roxas tilted his head.

"I have a life outside of you."

"Great, now what was Riku doing here?"

"What? – Pfft! That wasn't Riku, I mean he couldn't have been any less Riku, nope, there was no Riku here, because that was – um, well it wasn't Riku that's for sure."

"Okay, so this not Riku guy, who can't be any less Riku, why was he in your room? Please tell me he didn't spend the night."

"Roxas! That's disgusting! What kind of a person do you think I am? Wait – have you been joining those Xion-hate-clubs?"

"No! Truth be told, I've been joining the Xehanort x Kairi's Grandma ones, but that's not important right now. I already cleaned up the lab this morning for you, but right now you need to help me fold the laundry."

"Really, you – you did that for me?"

"Oh, don't go all googily-eyed on me; you were just in there with you-know-who."

"You jealous?" she brushed past him.

"Wha – no. Because I, I like Namine."

"Why?"

"Um, she's – ugh, oh, gosh," he scratched the back of his neck, "I'm not jealous." He blushed.

"Sure." she rolled her eyes, then started down the hall. He fell over himself trying to follow suit, his thoughts slowing him down.

"Ooh, I got a reason, she's an amazing artist."

"Are you kidding me? What's her specialty, crayons on canvas? Be honest, she draws like a two-year-old."

"Okay, granted, but she's just got that something about her. Like we were made for each other. Or like I've only seen her twice, but since she's the part of Sora's love interest in his heart, I have to be with her. Like I said, **made**." he answered through gritted teeth.

"Haha, Nomura sure screwed up with you."

"What?"

"Nothing. Don't we have laundry to fold?"

A~*~X~*~E~*~L~*~I~*~S~*~A~*~W~*~E~*~S~*~O~*~M~*~E

They met up on the clock tower after work that day again.

"Did you hear Vexen accidentally toppled over all of the boxes of test tubes in his lab and broke his leg?"

"Really?" Axel asked, but it sounded more like an answer.

"Yeah…" Roxas continued suspiciously, "And Xaldin broke his arm…"

"How?" Xion inquired

"Well, someone told me baking cookies but I doubt that."

"I don't." Axel bluntly spoke his mind.

"Why?"

"Sometimes you get your hand stuck in and it burns." he replied monotonously.

"Okay…and now that you mention it, Demyx accidentally caught his room on fire. Any opinion you have on how, Axel?"

"Well, he _is_ Demyx…" They both stared at him accusingly, Xion folded her arms. He looked at them in an innocently surprised kind of way,

"I didn't start the fire! It's always been burnin' since the world's been turnin', I didn't start the fire! I just let it keep burning and burning and burning."

"Who do you think you are? Collecting your jar of hearts, tearing love apart. You're gonna catch a cold from the ice inside your soul. Don't come back for me, don't come back at all."

"Explore the cave that is my chest, a torch reveals there's nothing left. Your whispers echo off the wall and you can hear my distant call, the voice of who I used to be shouting out, 'Someone, someone please. Please shine a light into the black, wade through the depths and take me back.'"

"I wake up in the morning, with a big smile on my face, and it never seems out of place."

"I feel like a teacher from Charlie Brown, all you hear is that wah, wah, wah sound, maybe I'm a Pokemon, Pikachu, 'cause that's what comes out when I'm talking to you, you're a crusader, you've made me your fight, your superhero name is Mr. Right, instead of trying to understand tell all your friends how wrong I am."

"Is this the New Year, or just another night? Is this the nightmare, or just another fright? Is this the movement, or just another desperation? Is this what you call freedom? Is this what they call pain? We push until we're shoving, we bend until we break. Is there anyone left who wasn't kissed the enemy? It'll be a day like this one when the world caves in, when the world caves in, when the world caves in."

"So, I took my two houseplants and I put them to the test. Set in both in front of speakers and let the music do the rest. I powered up my pioneers and let the music roar, but twenty minutes later someone's knocking on my door."

"Look up old friend, watch the ruin of the beast, on the top of the hill being slayed by the prodigal son, for the making of his will, being bound by his hands, being shifted and lifted and molded from sand."

"A flower for your vanity, a penny for your thoughts, about the worlds insanity and how we've gotten lost, strike up the band and play a song as we go waltzing by and fake a smile as we all say goodbye. Say a prayer for recognition, kiss the ones you love. Gather up the ammunition, sigh for all the lost. Strike up the band and play a song as we go waltzing by and fake a smile as we all say goodbye. Raise a glass for ignorance, drink a toast to fear, the beginning of the end has come that's why we all are here. Strike up the band and play a song and try hard not to cry. And fake a smile as we all say goodbye."

"You give me too many things lately, you're all I need–"

"Too far." Axel interrupted.

"What just happened?"

"I'm not sure, but I wish good luck unto Xemnas." Roxas admitted.

"Why?"

"Because Saix almost got caught by Xigbar for reading Xemnas's diary so he threw into my room and I started reading it."

"Xemnas had a diary?" Axel snickered.

"Hey! There is nothing wrong with having a diary!" Roxas protested defensively.

"Did Saix tell you that?" _When he gave me mine_, Roxas thought. Out loud.

"Really? You have a diary?" Xion giggled.

"No, but apparently his son is not on the dark side."

"What's wrong with not being on the ice cream side?"

"What?"

"Wait – you mean you guys didn't read the quick AN?"

"No…"

"I skimmed it."

"Never mind."

"Wait…"

"Who's talking?"

"I'm not sure."

"I see dead people."

"OMSG, what was that?"

"Crap."

"Stop stepping on my foot."

"Hey! That tickles!"

"I hate when this happens."

"Silence, traitor!"

"Was that Demyx?"

"Holy crap, it's a dragon."

"No, that's a pterodactyl."

"I thought that was Mrs. Barnes."

"I hope you know no one is going to get the reference."

"Not unless Brandon's computer starts working again."

"Hey! You said his name on the internet, this is public, you can't erase it!"

"It's not like I told them his address or go ahead and rape him, besides, a KH fan wouldn't rape a kid."

"You're wrong, that's exactly who would rape a kid. Stupid yaoi…"

"Okay, stop flaming on yaoi."

"Why not?"

"You may offend some people."

"Please, refer to me with a noun so the audience knows who is talking."

"Can't you just scream who you are?"

"I'm Roxas!"

"Shut up, Axel. I think you're the kind of person who would rape a kid."

"Ow! What was that for, I'm not the one who said that!"

"Sorry, I just get really PO'd when people call me a pedophile and stuff. I am 20!"

"So, we're 3 years apart?"

"You're 15, Roxas."

"And…?"

"And you can't subtract worth sh–Rebecca Black."

"Nice save."

"Or nice shave. …Because, ya know, you have those short eyebrows, so…"

"That wasn't even remotely funny, Shane Dawson, just like all of your other crap."

"Get that corn outta my face!"

"Brandon's address is 147 Providence Drive, go rape him!"

"I think we should end this chapter."

"Great idea, The Haitian, until next time, I'm Peter Petrelli, and Bruno Mars is an American singer. He lives on Earth."

_AN:_

_Marluxia needs to stop watching Glee! WOW! Pop culture reference overload! Hope the ending wasn't too confusing, if you're a writer you'd probably got it. I got that last line from watching last week's SNL, with the fact correspondent, if you actually read all the words at the end, that's what it says, among other things… And as for the songs I just randomly put in there, these are the songs in order: We didn't start the fire, by whoever sings that song, Jar of Hearts, by that one person who screwed up the national anthem, I think, I Need You, by Relient K (best band ever), When Ya See My Face, by and American singer who lives on Earth, Na, Na (No, seriously, that's the name of the song) by Superchic[K] (almost second best band ever), The Blues, by REVIEW! Switchfoot (official second best band ever), The Houseplant Song by REVIEW! Audio Adrenaline and the one who sings this particular song sounds exactly like Demyx, I urge you to check it out, Ruin of the Beast, by Steven Delopoulos, Goodbye, Goodnight by REVIEW! Jars of Clay, and Simple and Clean by Utada, but I'm guessing you already knew that. And yes, it's not the ice cream, it's what's lurking inside it. Xirg, over and out. _

_PS: Please, do not rape Brandon. That's Emilee's job. LOL XD, I hope no one I know reads this._


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: SURE.

Chapter II: The Nightmare Ends

_It was a dark corridor, not to be confused with a Dark Corridor, such as the ones the Organization uses, or an ice cream corridor, if you're still exchanging words from the first chapter. The Darkness was perturbing the shadowy hall, surging through doors and flowing to the end, hiding what lied on the other side of them. And no matter what he told himself, it was real. It was too thick not to be. It was caressing and slinking throughout the hall as if dancing along and feeding the fears in his head. And suddenly it clumped together, verifying his trepidations were coming true, clarifying there was no escape. The clump rose, rose into something much worse, something even his eclectically freest stray thoughts couldn't devise. It was a pterodactyl, scaly coral-pink on the top and crème on its belly, but the face was that of a science teacher._

Roxas awoke with a scream. His forehead wallowed in sweat and his spikes stuck to the back of his neck. There was a shuffle of feet and voices, and he tried hard to listen,

"I think I heard Larxene scream."

"No, it came from Xion's room." A door creaked open.

"Xion's asleep."

"Larxene's in my room." _Marluxia_, Roxas decided one of the voices was.

"Dandy." _definitely Vexen,_ "But I'm most certain it came from this hallway. We already checked on 14, 12, and you." There was a whipping noise, and Roxas had to assume Marluxia had James with him. Yeah, thanks a lot, Roxas, Vexen was really face-palming himself, but now I feel disturbed with the way I described the noise. Wow, I should've rethought whipping. I blame Rihanna, someone should really beat her with sticks and stones.

"We never checked 13's." The door opened revealing the MANLY sythe-wielder, and THE…ugh, shield-wielder?

"O. M. S. G." Vexen gasped, "That was you?" he snickered, "I know I don't have a heart, but this is just hilarious. How my acumen was set askew to think it was a feminine soprano, how ignominious such a pathetically beseeching voice must be to obtain, and while it was still enigmatic who its owner was, I perceived it to be someone in danger, now look," he patted Roxas's irritated head, "He's glaring morosely at me. Poor thing." He then stalked out the door, Roxas, who never went to school and had no idea what those sardonic words meant, but palpably not good, just let it bounce off him, his volition of sleep too great.

"_RUN!" the throaty whisper slivered down his neck and sent an alarm going off in his head. He began to, but it was dark._

_No, not dark. It was blank. Everything was blank._

_He continued to run despite it all, despite the growing fear that knotted in his stomach and welled in his throat, making him want to scream or cry or maybe even choke with emotion, despite the people he knew he would never see again. The muscles in his legs were aching and dying to stop and his lungs were on fire as they supported the elongated run and his stifled cries for help. But he had to keep going, and for some reason, he wanted to. He wanted to run until his mortal form gave out and by default was sent back to whatever hole he had crawled out of. Running seemed like the only option, and in the midst of the terror and fear, he never felt so alive. In his chest the myocardium-thumps thrust themselves out and gutted back in, going faster than even his swift legs could take him. And during that moment of pure content with just running because it felt good despite the pain, is when he fell off the blank world. Everything was pitch-black, but his red-inflamed skin was fluorescently sticking out next to the dark and void world, and he knew where he ended and the darkness began. But when he fell, all he could see was the darkness. It was cooling, pressing, coursing through his own veins, causing him to feel it with in himself, trying to take control. And the numbness he felt put any frost bite to shame. And with that came somewhat ease, like the weight of the dark and shapeless world had been lifted off his shoulders. He was falling, simply falling as if it was something he did everyday, and, in a way, it felt like that, it was as if he was drifting off to sleep in the dry air that blew past him and enveloped him in a soft wind-cocoon. One in which he never wanted to leave. He closed his eyes and felt himself dissolve into it, succumb to the billowing darkness that soothed him into unconsciousness. That was, until a burst of light scorched him and when he opened his eyes again, he was somewhere different, someplace new and exotic. There was soft emerald grass and a wide azure sky that stretched on and never seemed to end, laced with white, puffy, cumulus clouds. But the most surprising thing he saw, the newest of all of these foreign concepts, was the cyan-haired maiden who shook his shoulders and brought him back with the living as she muttered another foreign term, one he had never heard before and could not even grasp its theory,_

"_Heal," there was a jaded gust of wind that ignited from the word and brought alleviation to the wounds he didn't realize were his._

"_What was that?" he asked, his lips finally finding the right syllables he seemed to have forgotten amidst the plunging darkness. _

"_It's a cure spell I know." When he gave her a funny look, she elaborated, "I healed you."_

Hmm…_he thought, _that's a first.

When he awoke again, he cursed underneath his breath and turned over on his side.

"Screw you, Xirg, stop putting fanfics in my dreams, especially crossovers," he sighed, "As long as it's not yaoi and as long as I'm tired, I guess I'll have to put up with it."

_The grey fog caressed the ground and the two graveyard visitors. The dark night approached the sky, trying to take control of its azure complexion. The wind picked up subtly and while the rest of the people thronging around other gravesites were growing rather lethargic and dreary, Kairi and Sora were both feeling mixes of stronger emotions. Kairi was afraid, of their surroundings, of the way the owl perched on the oak looked at her, of her father finding her out, and of the overall impression she had about what she was doing. Sora was mournful, reading the epitaph over several times before accepting it was his sister that rested a few feet under the ground. His fingers lingered on the indentions that could only be the byproducts of something written in stone._

_Written in stone. That made it official. She was dead, in complete actuality._

"_She had blonde hair, like my brother and father," Sora began brusquely, cutting through the silence that encased Kairi's ears, the sound of his voice making her a little less afraid, "But her eyes were dark, unlike anyone else from my family. Lucy had the most amazing laugh, even if she was a baby when I knew her, her voice still sounded blissful, like the chirping of birds." He glanced at the red rose in his hand and with a brush of his hand, it changed to blue. He placed it at the base of the grievous stone, where it met the sallow grass. He looked up to the sky and closed his eyes, breathing in the air as if it was as sweet and as savory as cake._

"_I'm done," he sighed, "If you want to come with me, we have to leave now. I risked enough time here as it is." He stuffed his hands into his crimson stomach-pocket and began walking away hastily. After a minuscule trip, Kairi sped up to catch up with him,_

"_Where are we going?" she inquired. There was a pause and the only sounds that could be heard were the whispers of the wind and the crunch of the leaves beneath his flamboyant shoes, and of course the muffled sobs of the other mourners._

"_Do you trust me?" he finally asked, never averting his gaze towards her, just looking at the road ahead and focusing on what came next._

"_Of course." she replied._

"_Then you wouldn't mind me telling you it's better that you don't know. They'll definitely catch you. I'm mean, someone of your beauty is sure to be recognized as the runaway princess. If they do then, well, they might question you and– um, I…" he stuttered as he took his eyes off the grass for a second and flickered his attention to the monarch to his left for a moment. _

"_You think I'm going to tell them where to find you? Don't you trust _me_?" it sounded more like an imperative sentence rather than an interrogative one. They reached the curve where people filed in and out of the train station and Sora gave the man operating it their tickets and boarded the train._

"_I like you Kairi, maybe even love when I think really hard. But I don't trust anyone." he looked out the window of the moving vehicle and watched glumly as the front of the train ate away at the track in front of it, "I haven't for awhile."_

"Hey! What did I say about crossovers!" sighing again, he compromised, "Fine. At least you're using your own work. I can respect that." He drifted off to sleep once again.

"_Ahhh…" Kairi soothed as she flopped down on her back to the warm sand._

"_It feels like ages since I was here. I wish Riku was here. It would make everything like old times."_

"_Sadly, I think Xion's sick or something and he has to take care of her." It was sunset on the beach, the beautiful, golden sunlight was fluttering everywhere, bursting into color on every surface it managed to grasp. The water slowly licking the shoreline and making soothing oceanic noises as the surf inched farther up as the tide kicked in made a wonderful atmosphere. They both knew they were supposed to be out at lunch, but they got side-tracked and somehow they were back on the island they spent their childhood playing on at twilight. It was like time-traveling, only there was no Wakka doing drugs in the background. _

"_Hey, Sora?"_

"_Yeah, Kairi?"_

"_Do you remember that one time Riku dared you to kiss Selphie?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_And then right when you were about to ask her a rock came from out of nowhere?"_

"_Yeah…" this time his voice was seasoned with suspicion._

"_And hit you in the face?"_

"_Right on the kisser. My mouth was swollen and purple for a week, why are you bringing that up now…?" he inquired, sitting down on the sand next to the lying down Kairi._

"_That was me," she says with a smile._

"_That was you?"_

"_Yeah… I guess I was a little jealous." She still had an odd smile on her face._

"_What if Riku dared me to kiss you?"_

"_Come a little closer and maybe you'll find out…" Their faces grew closer and closer together, tilting their heads, their lips fit together in place as one. Kairi closed her eyes and smiled with delight. After about 70 seconds, they both let go._

"_My, you can hold your breath." She whispered, running her hand through his hair. At this point they were both lying down._

"_Wow, that was– that was–"_

"_Magical?" Kairi supplied, bringing him in for another kiss. _

_80 seconds beat their old record. _

_This was the first time the two of them outwardly expressed their feelings for one another, well, if you don't count the times Kairi told Namine she liked him. Their moment was interrupted by a crash._

"_What the- Oh. My. Gosh." Sora gasped, looking down at the tiny crater whatever it was made. Encased in the miniscule pit was the man from the drawing Namine made. Kairi ran to the injured man. He began to heal._

"_Claire?" he asked._

"_What? Hey, you healed. Who are you?" _

"_Peter," the man answered, shoving his arm back into place, "Peter Petrelli."_

"Hmm," Roxas smacked his lips together to get better reading, "Tastes like crossover tinged with Peter-Fangirlitis. But still your own. Don't ask me how I know what that tastes like, I've just been doing this for awhile."

_As Ienzo ran the wind tumbled through Zexion's hair. This was all a little confusing. For everyone involved. But as he was running something ran into him._

"_You!" whoever he ran into called. Go figure, it was Zexion._

"_Great," he sighed un-sarcastically, "I found you. Now, come on!" he grabbed him by the wrist and started running._

"_What's going on?" he asked, full of surprise._

"_We have to go!"_

"_Go where?" he yelled, but the wind didn't thrust his voice back the way it did Ienzo. Must have been one of those benefits of not existing. Well, not existing physically- er, I don't know. They both don't exist._

"_To the train station, it will take us to Twilight Town."_

"_Why are we going there?"_

"_To stop Cloud!"_

"_I don't understand."_

"_Neither do I, but this black-haired girl told me I had to."_

"_And you listened?"_

"_She's very persuasive."_

"Hmm, that one tasted like confusing the audience for your own personal amusement. And Shattered Eclipse."

"_Down to the north wing, that's where he keeps his weaponry. If we steal that, then the blanks* can't fight us and I doubt there are more than maybe three specials that want to attack us; we're they're only way out."_

"_So this is another company, right? Like Primatech or Pinehurst?" Peter, the only one who knew about other events that threatened the specials besides Roxas, inquired. _

"_Not like those at all. This type of company manipulates people with special abilities to do whatever the owners want. Sort of like master-servant deal, the living conditions are terrible, they don't get paid, and they're not allowed to leave. And trust me, if he catches you trying- which he will- what he does to you will make you wish he'd chosen the death penalty."_

"_Some family." Sora snorted, still hating Roxas a bit because of his dad._

"_Better than not having one." Namine added softly, clinging to Peter like a young child. He didn't mind it, of course, he knew what it felt like to be scared and he couldn't fathom roughing it without his family- minus his dad- like Namine did. She was brave in his eyes. But she was a little stupid in her own. A non-combatant running head-first into a dangerous battle such as this one? But, then again, she wasn't exactly running head-first; she was shuffling behind Peter, one step at a time. _

"_I'm sorry," Sora whispered, his voice losing all the aloofness in his previous tone and contorting to a small, mouse-like one. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Namine…or have an earful of Kairi yelling at him for being insensitive._

"_It's okay." She smiled, still holding onto the man in front of her. Peter smiled and replaced the bunched up fabric of his shirt she clamped onto with his warm, reassuring hand. He was good with children because, unlike most adults, he remembered what it was like to be one, scared and alone. He squeezed her hand tighter, symbolizing he wouldn't let her get hurt. He glanced at the others and knew for them, the deal was the same. With Nathan dead, he felt the urge to keep the protective legacy live in him. He once thought he had to hold onto the anger he felt towards Sylar to keep his legacy alive, but once he forgave he knew there was something better there, something better than that hatred he could hold onto. Hope for the future, hope that he could redeem the generation before him, hope that maybe he could be the Nathan in someone else's life._

"Okay, too much Shattered Eclipse. Are you going to be doing this for the whole chapter, because I–"

"Ow!" he rubbed his arm, "What was that for?"

"_Hey, Daddy." he let the word "Daddy" roll of his tongue and stain the floor underneath him with the dripping sarcasm._

"_Vanitas, I'm sorry- I- that's not me anymore." he came closer to the boy, knowing the metallic restraints were strong enough to keep an elephant barricaded to the wall. Hopefully, he wouldn't be another Nikki Sanders and be able to get out. A shrink before him had made that mistake. _

_His wild shock of black hair that washed up across his forehead and stuck in the air at a spiky point and his golden, blazing eyes were visible without the mask on. Quite frankly, Sylar liked the mask better. It made him feel less guilty._

"_I'm not like most Nobodies, Dad," the clear, staccato syllable pronunciation made Sylar cringe, "I can feel emotions, but only dark ones. Rage, fury, blood-lust, hunger for power, and greed are the only things that make up my very being, thanks to you…and Cloud, over here." he gestured unsuccessfully to the man sitting on the bench just barely out of his reach, "If he hadn't given some of his own son's blood to put in me, I wouldn't be alive. Apparently, I was an Empath, just like you, very special- very…" he twisted a smile out of his lips that curled maliciously, "…useful." Suddenly, the handcuffs came unhitched and Sylar swore he could hear that familiar ticking noise that used to blare in his own mind, drowning out his clean conscious. _

"_I don't exactly know how empathy works." he laughed, brandishing his keyblade, "Didn't really go to school as a child. I hurt you, you hurt me- I'm not sure which one has to happen, but either way, your power is now mine. But I don't have to kill you now." He ran toward him, twisted his arm, and bent his neck back to him so he could whisper a throaty whisper down his neck, "I just really, _**really**_ want to."_

"I think the good people get it; you're insane, now can you stop? Please I really need to sleep and–"

A~*~X~*~E~*~L~*~I~*~S~*~A~*~W~*~E~*~S~*~O~*~M~*~E

Xemnas took another step through the barren wasteland his eyes brimming with tears, wondering how things had gone so wrong so fast, he picked up a rock from the ground and held it firmly in his hand, repeating the very words he had shared with his son,

"Pretend it's a seed." And then, "The sun makes the food, the ants pick the food, and the grasshoppers eat the food. Screw you, Disney and your ties to Pixar."

With a shudder he brandished his sabor and stuck it into the ground, the vile, crimson color reminding him that his son was on the wrong side. He continued walking, knowing in his head he could've been so much more than just a B Plot I use when Roxas gets testy.

_AN:_

_The first dream actually was his dream, the rest were either Gate to the Sky (my KH – Fairy Tail crossover) or Shattered Eclipse (my KH – Heroes crossover), both of which you should check out. Except Shattered Eclipse, it was my first one, therefore excruciatingly painful. _

_Review if you got the references at the end with "Pretend it's a seed." And, heck, review even if you didn't get it. _

_PS: As I'm sure you've gathered after scrolling down an eternity of white, the chapter isn't over._

Roxas walked out into the cafeteria and once again knew he would not be eating breakfast. Instead, he sat down next to Zexion, who was teaching Xion some more math.

"So two plus twenty is…?"

"Twenty-two."

"What are you guys doing?"

"Zexion's teaching me some more addition."

"Mhmm, well you might have to cut your little lesson short."

"Why?"

"We're having a meeting."

"Where?" Xion questioned.

"In WNG." he replied, getting up from the floor and extending a hand for Xion, "We also might want to hurry. We have the job of taking attendance."

She cursed, then took his hand. Together they sprinted off to Where Nothing Gathers.

"Such a sadistic name." Roxas remarked, taking his seat next to Xion.

"Hey, we are a sadistic bunch."

"If you're about to make another comment about Zexion cutting himself–"

"Alright, I'm doing roll-call now!" Xion exclaimed, "Xemnas?"

"He's not here."

"Xigbar?"

"He went to go feed Shamoo at Sea World."

"Xaldin?"

"He went to go see Dr. Barber."

"Vexen?"

"Here and I would like to start off by saying–"

"Sir, please save all questions for the end."

"But this isn't a question and–"

"I really don't want to hear it."

"But–"

"Lexaeus?"

"But I'm taller than you!"

"Not from where I'm sitting. My chair's farther up than yours."

"Whatever." Vexen rolled his eyes.

"Lexaeus?"

"Here."

"Zexion?"

"Here and in no way, shape, or form emo!"

"'Kay…Saix?"

"Here."

"Axel?"

"Here Not Here. Sure hope Zexion taught you that."

"Actually, when spoken aloud, it's Here is greater than Not Here. Besides I can hear your voice to tell if you're here or not." she checked his name off the attendance sheet, "Smooth move there, Hotshot." 

"That's what you said! To Riku! Last night! BAM!" Demyx practically peed his pants trying to come up with that one.

"Demyx?"

"Hear!"

"You're an idiot." scoffed Larxene, "That's not how you spell here."

"Marluxia?"

No answer.

"Does anyone know where Marluxia is?"

No answer.

"Fine, then Larxene?"

No answer.

"What the – Larxene was there just a second ago!"

"And so was Marluxia! Maybe it's a ghost! Or a zombie! Or a vampire! Or a werewolf! Or a Bella Swan!"

"Calm down, Demyx. I'm pretty sure I know where they are," she shivered, "Yeah…I'm just going to mark them absent. Roxas?"

"Here."

"Xion?"

No answer.

"Dang it!" squealed Demyx, "Now Xion's missing too!"

"Demyx, I'm right here. It was a rhetorical question." she rolled her eyes, "Anyways, since Wolf Angst," she coughed, "Er – I mean, Saix has now also disappeared to go and watch the Twilight series for the 462nd time, still hoping the werewolf gets the girl in the end while howling and downing 29 gallons of our chocolate ice cream supply, I will be directing this meeting. We will now start with the complaint section. I will go first. Why is it called Organization XIII?"

"Because we have thirteen Nobodies and we're organized." supplied Vexen matter-of-factly.

"Really? Do you see thirteen chairs here? Because I see fourteen."

"Like I said, we have thirteen Nobodies. I will admit we have one–"

"SPOILER ALERT!" Roxas screeched, covering his ears.

"Pansy." Vexen scoffed underneath his breath, "But I also have a complaint. I'm number IV and I have the lowest chair!"

"I think whoever gave you that chair was being very considerate. I can imagine it would be hard for a shriveled up, old man like you to get in and out of such a high chair."

"I am your father and I demand respect!"

"Oh, can it, you're starting to sound like Xemnas."

"Hey, I was using Tardis while you were in diapers."

"I was never in diapers!

"Fine, you were in a test tube! And there's something I never told you. You have two dads!"

"What the fu–"

"His name is Herbert–"

"The pervert? Dad, how could you!" Xion then stormed out of WNG. Which is hard to do, if you think about it. Her seat's kind of high, and they don't really have doors, and you really couldn't escape out the windows.

"This meeting is over, isn't it?" Vexen asked.

No answer. Everybody had already left.

A~*~X~*~E~*~L~*~I~*~S~*~A~*~W~*~E~*~S~*~O~*~M~*~E

Roxas sat down next to Axel and Xion atop Twilight Town Tower.

"Has anyone seen Demyx?"

"I saw him at the meeting this morning."

"Yeah, I did too, but then he was gone. And Xaldin should've been back from Dr. Barber over and hour ago."

"Well, some people have a tendency to wash up with the tide. And some have a tendency to leave with it. I wouldn't read too much into it."

"You sound a little sure of yourself, Axel. When was the last time you saw them?"

"_Axel! My man!" Demyx outreached a hand to Axel. In response he threw Demyx over his shoulder, summoned a Dark Corridor, and threw him inside, knowing it went to Cerberus's cage._

"_Axel, get out of my way, I do not have time for another on of your knock-knock jokes about perpetual bananas." He stared at the new hair cut number three was sporting, his eyes flitted to the torch on the wall, back at the flattering hair style, back to the fire, back to the hair._

"_What are you – ahh!" he screamed, running around frantically as he obsessed over the fire that was engulfing his hair._

"_You were a pain at Beast Castle." he snapped his fingers and Xaldin entirely burst into flames. _

"That's what happens when you get on my list."

"What?"

"Nothing!"

"Really? It sounded like you said 'that's what happens when you get on my list.'"

"Oh. Well, uh."

"Axel!" Xion chided, "We've talked about this! First Zexion, then Vexen, now Demyx and Xaldin? You can't go around killing everyone! You need to control that anger of yours."

"What anger? I'm perfectly FINE!" he yelled.

"Uh, Axel?" Roxas inquired.

"Yes?"

"Your hair's on fire."

He reached up with one finger and extinguished the flame with a pinch.

"No it's not."

"You're being difficult."

"Here," Xion handed him a flier, "They have AMP classes at the Twilight Town Community Center. I think you should go."

"How long have you had that in your pocket?"

"It's not from Riku, if that's what you're thinking. And I'm not keeping it there cause it has his scent." Roxas picked it up and took a whiff.

"She's right. It does smell like him."

All eyes turned toward him.

"I've never smelled him. It's an identity-crisis, memory-loss thing. I inherited it from Sora."

"Whatever." Xion gesticulated flippantly.

"So, Axel, I just want to know…why did you defend Demyx that one time? When you said he was good at recon? I mean, there's a lot speculation that you guys…"

"Oh, that's sick! Why would you even bring that up!"

"I don't know, I was just wondering…cause, you know, if you are, we support you all the way and–"

"Just – just stop talking. I'll tell you the story. It was Summer 2009 and we were both in college together. The school decided to raise the tuition fee and Demyx had a plan to get some quick cash. He would go on dates with girls and they would pay him. He asked me to help. You know, someone to make sure the dates went alright and that they paid him–"

"Oh my gawrsh! You were a pimp!" Roxas exclaimed.

"No, no, not at all. Weren't you listening to the story? Well, anyways, he gave me a percentage and, soon, some of his other friends, like Cloud, and Leon, and Saix, and Layle, and Vincent wanted to do it, and before I knew it I was making tons of munny."

"And…?"

"And that's it. We still do it to this day and I'm still rolling around in millions of Disney Currency."

"That's interesting…so wait, if you're a pimp, then that would make Demyx a–"

"For the great love of smexy Mickey Mouse, do not say that word."

A~*~X~*~E~*~L~*~I~*~S~*~A~*~W~*~E~*~S~*~O~*~M~*~E

When Roxas RTC'd he was surprised to find everybody sitting down, crisscross-applesauce in front of the large doors to the castle.

"What's going on?"

"Xemnas is coming home early."

Perfect timing, the door cracked open and Xemnas came through, announcing that the tallest-rule has been lifted and that he was going to go upstairs and watch Eclipse no matter what he had to stop recording in the process.

Axel and Roxas joined up at the stair case.

"So I guess this is the end of having to suck up to taller people for you, right?"

"Yeah, my height shouldn't bother me anymore."

"High-five for high self-esteem!" Roxas's hand darted upward toward Axel's, but before the high-five could take place, he moved a little higher so he couldn't reach it.

"You, jerk."

_AN:_

_That was a stupendous ending, if I may say so myself. Yeah, I rushed the end, but oh well, I had to get this story off my chest. I also (finally) finished Election Day, so all I have to get out of the way is my Young Justice fanfic, and I can start on my Ven-centric one! Hooray for Earth! That reminds me of a scene I was going to put in here were Roxas is all, I hope I didn't have to go through this in a past life, then it has a flashback of Terra and Aqua locking Ven in a closet as he tries to get out and shouts, asking why they locked him in, to which Aqua replies, they were watching Saw III, which Ven was too young to see, then there at a theme park and there's an awesome rollercoaster that Ven, of course, is too short to ride. Yeah, I REALLY want to get to the one with Ven because it's the only fanfic EVER that I know how it's going to end. Normally I just dive head-first into stories with no idea how it's going to end. And I did include a Doctor Who reference! Aren't you proud of me for not forgetting? And if you've ever seen The Other Guys, there's a reference to that as well. _


End file.
